Pengakhiran bagi sebuah permulaan..

Sejak aku kahwin sethn lapan bulan yg lepas and in fact before aku kahwin pun,aku pernah ada hasrat yang one day aku akan postkan dalam blog entry satu gambar..gambar ini..

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That magic stick was mine taken at Subuh on 5th August 2010..Time nih aku kat kampung mlk pindah..Kebetulan aku and en suami balik kampung and that day was supposed to be the perfect day to do the UPT since my period already missed by 5 days..En suami bila tgk nih dia punya senyum sampai ke telinga and spontaneously terus pegi tunjuk kat my MIL kat bilik dia..and my MIL terus called my kaklong at KK to inform her..and yes,i admit that morning was one of my happiest moment in my life..

We went to LPP.KN to confirm the pregnancy on 10th August 2010 sehari before puasa and it was confirmed..Doc set appointment on 24th August for an ultrasound scan and by the time aku sepatutnya on 7th weeks..

 

 

 

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 That is my u/s scan..From the scan,doc nampak mcm 'the sac' @kantung tak tele dgn 7wks..nampak tak sac dlm circle merah tu..it supposed dah ada heart beat..tapi mcm kecik and doc tak guarantee yg pregnancy ni akan menjadi and doc bagi lagi seminggu utk dtg buat scan semula..Dalam masa seminggu nih kalau ada bleeding aku kena cepat2 bagitau doc..Korang fikirlah sendiri apa yg aku and husband rasa masa doc bagitau tu..and the nurse berkali-kali suruh aku and husband sabar..Kami balik tapi dlm hati aku doa supaya masih ada harapan..

It was yesterday afternoon masa aku nak kenc and i found out ada sikit bleeding..and then after few hours bleeding tu makin byk tapi tak sebanyak mcm period tapi without any pain..aku call LPP.KN untuk appointment..

And today 27th August 2010 pada hari mulia Nuzul Quran, it was confirmed by the ultrasound scan aku dah keguguran..the sac was already at opening tunggu masa nak keluar and my small cute black 'dot' was not there anymore..Masa drive balik taktau la mcm mana aku boleh sampai rumah sbb mentally aku ntah ke mana melayang-layang..

So,this is my last post on this blog..Aku dah letih physically and mentally ..Aku cuma nak rehat sethn or 2thn or forever..Aku reda semua yg jadi sbb aku percaya kita semua hidup dalam ketentuan Allah..

 

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri..Maaf zahir dan batin..

p/s no1: Aku taktau apa yg en suami rasa sedih,terkilan atau apa2 lagi..Aku harap dia sabar mcm yg aku cuba buat..

 

 

p/s no.2:Aku rindu abah..

p/s no.3: aku tak sabar sgt nak beraya..bukan beraya la actually cuma aku nak cuti..aku tak sabar nak bercuti di Sabah..and then bercuti di Kedah..and then kalau sempat aku nak pi Penang nak mkn puas2 mknan yg sedap..lagik bagus kalau masa cuti beraya nanti aku tak jumpa saudara mara..aku hanya nak jumpa saudara2 yg aku sayang saja..